1.17.2009

Sometimes It's Okay to be Lonely ...

Right?


RIGHT?!


Heh heh. I find myself kind of out of sorts tonight. I'm overwhelmed with all the stuff I need to do. I seem to be at a place in my life where I'm filled with ideas, yet empty of energy. It's weird, but I have so much to say, yet the focus to write it down escapes me. I've been on break from school for three weeks and have managed to get (almost) caught up on stuff around the house and office. If going back to school while also working full time and being a single mom has taught me anything; it's taught me to value my free time. These past few weeks have felt like a vacation! As such, I have spent a lot of time doing ...absolutely nothing.


I have channel surfed aimlessly; read for pleasure; watched a few movies; and even *gasp* walked around the mall. I don't even, like shopping, but there was something kind of fun about getting out there and being a part of the masses.


Maybe that's what's been missing from my life; that feeling of being a part of something.


See, in order to accomplish this whole school/work/life thang, I have to keep myself on a really really tight schedule. This means there's no time to go out with friends; to attend a movie; to host a dinner party; or even to have lengthy phone conversations.

Most of my closest friends live out of town, so communication is via phone and e-mail - both of which get back burner-ed because of school demands.

I keep telling reminding myself that this my last semester before taking some time off, so my self-imposed solitude should be ending soon.

But sometimes I do just get a bit lonely.

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Having limitations on your lifestyle is NOT the same as being poor.